


Evisceration

by Whistlelark



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Anal Sex, Cunnilingus, Eventual Sex, FTM Daryl, Gay Sex, Homosexuality, Language, M/M, Multiple Orgasms, Trans Daryl, female to male
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-10-05
Updated: 2015-10-23
Packaged: 2018-04-25 00:30:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 11,046
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4939771
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Whistlelark/pseuds/Whistlelark
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Daryl said, “What happens in this prison cell, stays in this prison cell,” He meant it, but he never expected things to take the path that they did. Secrets can only stay hidden for so long, and feelings never die; a lesson he’ll soon learn.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I really have been meaning to sit down and grind out another chapter of ‘Splitting Butterflies,’ Really I have. But this little plot bunny is something that had come into my head while I was thinking about which direction to take ‘Splitting Butterflies,’ And it’s been nipping at my ankles ever since. So it’s time to get it out so I can focus on my other fic :D
> 
> I’ve also decided to take some liberties, for all intents and purposes; Lori was never pregnant and thus, there is no Judith, however, Lori is still dead in later chapters (Mainly because I don’t like her,) 
> 
> Also, A fair warning, the tags are vague and few for a reason. I’ll add more tags later on, I’m sure, but I feel like adding too many too soon would be giving out too much of what I have planned, and I love surprises ;D Don’t you?

Hershel had always been a kind, yet stern sort of man. A man with beliefs once firmly seated in the word of God, that belief however had begun to fade after everything the elderly man had been through. He’d lost so much family, so many friends, seen the evil that humans were capable of when life became about surviving and not just about living. Survival made people do crazy things; made people lie, manipulate, and kill. All things that Hershel never could have imagined having a part in before the world came to Hell.

However, things for their little group had seemed to be looking up as of late.

They’d finally settled in at the prison, securing it, clearing it out, even planting food. Things were looking up, and considering the shape the rest of the world was in, he wagered that they weren’t doing half bad. Even after losing his leg, Hershel was an optimistic man, a good man, but also a man of the past. There were certain things that Hershel didn’t understand, things that he wasn’t bothered enough to seek answers to. Little did he know what was about to wind up on his doorstep…or rather, in the confines of his prison cell.

Daryl had been gone practically all day, sneaking through the woods to hunt squirrels, raccoons, Hell, even a badger would have done by this point. He’d made hardly a sound, however, anyone looking at him, could have been able to tell that something just wasn’t quite right. It was the look in his eyes, something wild and panicked even though there wasn’t a walker to be seen around for miles. His heart was tight in his chest, something coiled deep in his belly, blood pumping.

For weeks, he’d been trying to ignore it; the clenching in his stomach, the feelings of nausea, of fatigue, the aches. It was nothing, he told himself. He was worrying too much, or it was from hunger, simple as that. By the time the sun had begun setting, Daryl had turned back to the prison, six squirrels stuffed in a bag that he’d tossed over his shoulder. 

They all needed some extra protein lately, and this would help. 

Daryl had taken to skinning the squirrels once he got back to the prison, tossing their guts to the ground as he cleaned them. Glenn already had a fire going in a small pit they’d dug out. But Daryl was still distracted. No sooner than cleaning up his catch, Daryl passed the squirrels to Maggie, who had taken charge of cooking them up with Carol’s supervison, Daryl disappeared. He hadn’t even eaten. He knew he wouldn’t be able to keep it down anyway, so what was the point?

Glenn tore a small bite off of one of the squirrels, the flesh lightly charred. He’d never thought he’d get used to eating squirrel, but it was better than other things they’d eaten out here, “Anyone else notice Daryl acting…different?” He inquired, a few of the others lifting their heads. Carol easily looked the most concerned; he was her ‘Pookie,’ after all.

“What do you mean, different?” She inquired.

“I dunno,” Glenn shrugged, “I mean, he’s always been kinda weird, but…He loves his hillbilly cuisine, y’know. I don’t remember seeing him eat much for the last few days, and the other day, I saw him coming back in from outside, I think he was throwing up,”

“You think he’s sick,” Carol’s voice became urgent, tight, and wound up in panic.

“Well, he could be…He’s just so distant all the time, when I asked him he just grunted at me like a caveman,”

Carol sighed, looking down momentarily, “You just don’t know how to talk to him,” She smiled softly. Ever since she lost Sofia, She had a soft spot for Daryl, she knew how sweet he could be. How kind and caring. He had a heart of gold, he just didn’t like showing it, that’s all.

“If he is sick, we’re gonna need to know, get him away from the rest of the group for a while,” Lori interjected, a job that Rick would normally take for himself, but Rick was busy contemplating himself as he swallowed another small bite of the gamey meat that Daryl had brought back for him.

“We can’t just separate him from the group if that’s it,” Carol protested.

“And if that is it, we can’t have any kind of disease spreading around,” Lori clarified, “Rick, why don’t you talk to him later? Maybe have him go see Hershel, take a look at him?”

Rick’s eyes lifted, and he nodded, forcing away any conclusions that he might otherwise jump to, “You’re right, I’ll go have a word with him when we’re done here, See if I can’t figure out what’s going on,” He licked his head, “Don’t you worry, we’ll take care of this,” he reassured them, as they all finished up their modest dinners before disappearing back into the prison, Glenn stayed behind to smother the fire.

Once the others were settled back in their own cells, Rick decided it was time to talk to Daryl, finally. Rick would never admit it, but he was a little…intimidated by Daryl in a way, thanks to the last of their encounters. Rick didn’t really want to think about it, nor did he want to think that he had anything to do with Daryl’s recent behavior. Passing through the cell block, he reached the cell that Daryl had designated his own, rounding the corner, he glanced through the bars. Daryl was stretched out on the cot, long legs splayed out ahead of him, neck bent uncomfortably against the wall, arms across his stomach. He looked exhausted, dazed, worn out, and Rick’s features fell. Before Rick had a chance to ask if Daryl was alright, the bowman lifted his eyes, “What you want, Rick?” Daryl snapped, voice gruff.

Rick sighed and slipped into the cell, taking a seat at the edge of Daryl’s bed, “Listen, the others, they’re all worried about you. You doing okay?”

Daryl huffed and rolled his eyes, “The others are worried, huh? And you ain’t?” Daryl hissed, clearly displeased with Rick’s presence. 

“Daryl, don’t be like that,”

“Like what?”

“You know that I worry about you,”

“That’s why you broke it off,” Daryl’s eyes kept themselves locked on Rick, bearing into him.

Rick swallowed, unsure of what to say for a moment, before he nodded, “You know why it had to end, Daryl,” Rick focused on remaining calm, collected. He couldn’t explode on Daryl, not after what happened the other night, he’d wounded Daryl enough already, and he knew it, “I did it for you above everything else, you know that if we kept that up, someone could find out…” 

Rick couldn’t even finish his sentence, afraid to utter another word, least wandering ears catch it.

Daryl had a secret, a deep one, and so far, Rick was the only one to know about it, other than Merle and Daryl’s parents – Not that his parents had been happy about it. Daryl hadn’t been born as Daryl, rather, he’d been born a Darby. Fucking Darby Sue Dixon. Daryl grimace at just the thought of the name, of his childhood; of growing up, being forced into dresses, having his hair curled, and told what a pretty little girl he was. 

He’d make such a good wife one day. Daryl spat at the floor next to his bed at the thought. 

Daryl had been a little girl, born with all the little parts that little girls had. Shame was, he was no girl. Despite what the doctor said when he arrived, despite what biology told him. Daryl Dixon was no little girl. Growing up was hard, he began getting his hair cut, wearing his brother’s clothes, and of course, was often beaten for being a dyke. Little did his father know though, that there little girl, Darby (Fuck, he hated that name, who the fuck names their kid Darby?) was actually bound to grow up as a gay man. Gay? Yes. Daryl had a thing for men, could never stand the soft curves of women. He liked the power of men, their sense of control, dominance, and above all, he’d preferred that about Rick, coupled with Rick’s sincere tenderness. 

Those traits had been what eventually lead Daryl to trusting Rick, to letting Rick know his deepest secret. And when Rick embraced it, the two of them found themselves wound together in a web of lies, of passion, and desire. But after just a few weeks, Rick brought an end to it.

“Yeah, whatever,” Daryl snort, “You just don’t want them finding out cus a’ Lori,” Rick stilled himself, lifting a hand to touch Daryl’s leg, but Daryl’s leg shot out, kicking at his hand, “Don’t you dare fucking touch me,” Daryl hissed like a wounded animal, rolling onto his side and tucking his legs up under him, “Just get the fuck out, Rick,” He warned, dangerously.

Rick’s heart dropped and he let out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding, “Alright,” He finally gave in, “I’ll go, but Daryl,” He stood, glancing over his shoulder, “Go talk to Hershel, let him look over you, we need to make sure you’re okay,” Before Daryl could retort, Rick disappeared.

Daryl rolled his eyes, he already knew what was wrong, and a checkup from Hershel wasn’t going to help, but if it made Rick shut up, he'd oblige.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for your support everyone!  
> You've all been so tremendous!

It wasn’t much later after that uncomfortable conversation with Rick, that Daryl decided that he might as well get this over with. He dragged himself off of his cot, and ran a hand through his hair as he exited the cell. It was getting late. As he made his way to Hershel’s cell, he could see a few members of the group already curling into their beds ready to catch some well needed sleep. Just beyond the bars of Hershel’s cell, Daryl came to a stop, not saying anything until Hershel lifted his head, just hoping that the old man wouldn’t have noticed him and let him just walk back to his own cell. He could have at least told Rick that he’d tried in that case.

“Oh, Daryl, Rick said you’d be on your way,” The elderly man was sitting at the edge of his cot, going through a few pieces of paperwork that he’d found in the warden’s office out of curiosity. This was about the best form of entertainment they had these days, rummaging through things, collecting articles of the past, of a better time – which was ironic when you were talking about prisons, “Said you haven’t been feeling well lately, well come in, we’ll take a look at you,” Hershel gestured with a hand for Daryl to come in.

Daryl shifted on his feet, looking uneasy, “Can we go somewhere else? Next cell block over, maybe? I want this…private,” He said lowly, not wanting the others to hear just in case anyone hadn’t dozed off quite yet.

Hershel nodded in understanding, not asking any questions for the mean time as he grabbed his crutches, “Of course, I’ll respect your privacy, whatever makes you feel more comfortable,”

Comfortable. No matter where they were, no matter how quiet this conversation was, where was no way in Hell that it was going to be even the least bit…comfortable for Daryl. He wanted to avoid telling anyone else about…fuck, he didn’t even want to think it. Rick knew, and he could barely stand the fact that Rick had that knowledge about him. It drove him fucking nuts.

Slowly though, they made their way through the next cell block, taking precautions to lock themselves in. Once secured inside, Daryl folded his arms and leaned against the nearest wall while Hershel rested himself in his crutches, “Alrighty, now what seems the to be the problem? Can you describe your symptoms for me?” Despite the fact that Hershel had originally learned to work on animals, as a veterinarian, over time, he realized that working on a human and an animal wasn’t quite as different as most people assumed. Sure, there were differences of course, and plenty of them, but his knowledge as a vet was a great asset to their little group. It was better than nothing.

Daryl looked away, “Jus’ been feeling a little nauseous lately, sick to my stomach, throwin’ up,” He muttered out. “It’s no big deal, really,”

Hershel nodded, “Rick seems to think it’s enough to be concerned, he’s mighty worried about you,” To which Daryl only snort and rolled his eyes, “Anything else?”

Daryl swallowed, “Not really, just tired, ain’t we all?” Daryl lifted his brows at Hershel.

“And you’re sure that’s all?” Hershel moved a little, reaching out a hand to feel at Daryl’s forehead with his wrist, “You’re not warm, you don’t have a fever,” Hershel furrowed his brows, “Doesn’t seem to be anything too serious, but take care of yourself, make sure you rest, and if any other symptoms come up, you let me know, alright?” Hershel withdrew his hand, “If this is something to be worried about, we’ll need to make sure that we can identify it as soon as possible,”

Daryl rolled his head away, tucking his hands into his pockets and turning away from Hershel, taking a few steps, bottoms of his shoes scraping against the concrete floor, “Fuck, Hershel, I already know what it is,” Daryl hissed out, frustrated as he lifted something from his pocket, turning and tossing it at Hershel’s feet…or…foot.

Hershel looked down in confusion, “You already…?” Hershel hunched down, momentarily cursing the fact that Daryl couldn’t have just handed it to him. It was small, a strip of white plastic. Hershel’s eyes widened as he brought it up into the pale light coming in through the high windows. Through a tiny window, there was a little pink plus sign.

“Daryl, Daryl…Who’s is this?” Hershel looked up in awe, “You’re telling me, someone is with child?” Daryl lifted both hands into his hair, tugging the dirtied strands lightly as he squeezed his eyes shut, his back still to Hershel, “Daryl…who’s child is this?” He insisted, urgency leaking into his voice.

Daryl’s answer was soft, croaked out, “Rick’s. It’s Rick’s,”

“Lori’s…pregnant?” Hershel sighed, “Good lord,” He sighed, torn between being elated, and being horrified. How would they take care of a baby in this situation? But as this and a dozen other questions ran through his head, Daryl finally turned to look at him, features grim.

“It ain’t Lori,” Daryl swallowed, shaking his head.

“It isn’t…?” Hershel was shocked, Rick had always seemed to be such a faithful man, but this would explain why Daryl didn’t want anyone else to know. If Rick had had an affair, it would break Lori’s heart.

Daryl swallowed again, throat dry, “It’s mine,” Daryl looked away, possibly in shame, “Mine and Rick’s,”

Hershel’s brows lifted in absolute confusion, “Daryl…” He didn’t even know what to say at this point, “How could…you and Rick…you can’t…” Sure, Daryl was obviously a little uneducated in certain things, but surely he knew that men couldn’t bare children…Wait, if Daryl was claiming that it was his and Rick’s, then…they were…behind Lori’s back. Hershel’s heart sank before Daryl could even begin explaining.

“For fuck’s sake, Hershel, I’m not an idiot,” Daryl hissed defensively as he planted his back against the nearby wall, sinking down to the ground, his elbows on his knees, “I’m…I wasn’t born…” Daryl didn’t know how to get the words out, “I went through a transition, Hershel…” He elaborated, “…Got a sex-change, years ago…”

Hershel’s lips parted, leaning forward slightly without noticing, “You’re…Daryl, You’re a transsexual…?” Hershel wanted to be careful, this was clearly a difficult conversation for Daryl to go through.

Daryl chuckled almost bitterly, hating the old fashioned medical sound of that, “We prefer transgender nowadays,” He closed his eyes for a minute, it felt almost good to get that out there, almost, “Don’t you dare tell a damned soul, Hershel,” 

Hershel’s features softened as he came closer, “You have my word, if you want anyone else to know, other than Rick and I…you’re going to be the one to tell them,” Speaking of Rick, “You and Rick…you’ve been?” Hershel was shocked, they were close, sure, but Hershel never expected something like this, “How long has this been going on?”

“Few weeks,” Daryl resigned softly, “But it’s over, he couldn’t do it no more,”

“Does Rick…does he know about this?” Hershel lifted the positive pregnancy test up and Daryl shook his head.

“He don’t know,” Daryl lifted a thumb to the side of his mouth, biting lightly against the flesh, “He can’t ever know, Hershel, You can’t tell him,” His voice became urgent again, “Swear it, Hershel, Swear you won’t tell him,”

“Daryl…he’s going to find out sooner or later,” Hershel handed the test back to Daryl who snatched it and through it back into his pocket, “…When you start showing, how are you going to explain that to him, to the others,” 

Daryl chewed his bottom lip, shaking his head, “You don’t get it, Hershel, I ain’t gonna show,” He finally lifted his head, eyes glassy, “You gotta get this out of me, Hershel, I can’t carry it,” His voice became pleading, “You gotta get it out,” His voice began to shake as a hand moved forward, “Hershel, please,” 

Hershel’s stomach became a knot, “Daryl, I can’t…It’s wrong, You just want me to kill your child, Daryl…Daryl, I can’t…”

Daryl’s eyes squeezed together tight, grabbing onto Hershel’s pants, “I can’t do this, Hershel, I need it out,” His head dropped, a few unseen tears falling to the ground, Hershel only noticed them when he saw the spots on the concrete, “Don’t make me carry this thing,” Finally, his voice cracked, a sob rattling through his chest.

He couldn’t do this. Daryl couldn’t carry a child, and he could never let Rick find out that it ever happened in the first place. 

Hershel’s heart twisted deep in his chest, but he knew what he had to do, “…You might not survive, Daryl…” 

“I know, I don’t care…”

“I’m gonna need an assistant…who do you trust enough to now about this?” Hershel swallowed deeply, horrified that he was even thinking of agreeing to this. It went against everything he ever believed.

Daryl’s hands stayed tight, grasping Hershel’s pant leg, “Beth, I want it to be Beth,”

Hershel nodded shakily, “We’re gonna need a respirator, you’ll need to be out…and I can not stress enough, that you might not make it through this alive. Are you willing to take that risk?”

Daryl could only nod, eyes blurry with tears.

He just needed this out. He couldn’t do this. He couldn't keep it. Not even for Rick.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m gonna throw a warning in here guys, this chapter is very morbid, dark, gross, and all around disturbing. If you are sensitive regarding the subject of abortions and such, please either proceed with caution, or go find a happier story to read. This is not a happy chapter. Again, read at your own risk. Thank you for your understanding.

Unfortunately for Daryl, it had taken him, Hershel, and Beth several more weeks in order to gather all of the supplies that they would need together. Time and time again, Daryl had urged Hershel, insisting that he would be fine, that they had enough, that they should get it done and over with. But Hershel was both stubborn and apprehensive about the situation, he wanted to be sure that they had every little thing they would need. Heaven forbid they lose Daryl during the abortion. It would raise too many questions among their group. Questions that Hershel did not have the heart to answer behind Daryl’s back, even if the man passed away during it.

Abortion. Jesus. Every time Daryl even thought that word, he felt like his gut was wrenching, that he was going to be sick. The fact that he needed one, made his skin crawl.

He told Hershel (A few times) that if Daryl didn’t make it, that the old man would say that a walker got to him, tore his stomach open. Even after death, Daryl wouldn’t forgive the man if the others found out what Daryl had been hiding all this time. He didn’t want them to remember him as a woman. Didn’t care if they thought of him as some freak – but he couldn’t have them thinking about him being born and raised as a girl. He’d turn over in his grave, better yet, he’d come back and eat them alive. Every single one of them.

Fortunately for Daryl though, the operation had gone surprisingly well – considering the fact that they had little in the way of proper equipment. When it was time to put Daryl down, Hershel had told the others that Daryl’s condition was worsening, that he suspected it was his appendix, but that there was only one way to find out. Daryl insisted on only Hershel and Beth being present, but in the end, Hershel had ushered Maggie in, after learning that his daughter and Daryl had the same blood type. He couldn’t risk Daryl bleeding out, so Maggie was on standby, just in case, she was also a second set of eyes and hands, ready to assist. 

Hershel had never done something like this on a human before, and he couldn’t believe the tremendous amount of guilt that filled him as he’d sliced Daryl’s lower abdomen open. He tried to keep things neat and tidy, but of course, something like this was going to be messy. By the end of it, he was covered in blood, the floor was splattered, Hell, some of it had splashed against the cell wall. The fetus had grown more than Hershel had expected, and he realized that Daryl had been gathering larger shirts to ensure that no one would notice that he was…with child. 

Nearly an hour had passed from the moment that the sharpened knife had pierced Daryl’s flesh, to the moment that Hershel pulled the incredibly undeveloped fetus from Daryl’s womb. The small thing had grown just enough to tell that it was becoming a human, fitting easily within the palm of just one hand. Beth began to cry at the sight, burying her face into her hands. Maggie was visibly shaking at the grim reality of the situation, coming to grips with what was actually happening, that her father was assisting Daryl in killing his own child, the child that he’d conceived with Rick. However, it was as Hershel eyed Daryl’s unconscious face, eyes casting themselves over Daryl’s body. This was what Daryl not only wanted, but needed. 

Daryl was a man, he couldn’t carry a baby.

It didn’t matter that Daryl had the physical capacity to do it. That nature, biology, or that any God that ever existed gave him that ability…the fact of the matter was that emotionally, Daryl couldn’t do it. It would have killed him, on the inside, in ways that no one else would have been able to see, feel, or relate to. He would have rather died; disemboweled, devoured, dismembered by a walker. 

If Daryl had had that baby, carried it any longer than he already had, nothing ever would have made it okay.

So Hershel did the only thing that he could do; he got rid of it.

They’d nearly lost him, needing a transfusion of Maggie’s blood to keep him from the brink of death, but in end, they’d done it. Daryl was alive, he pulled through. He was going to make it.

Daryl would never have to see it. Wouldn’t have to suffer another day, knowing that his body was doing everything it could to keep it alive.

Hershel, Maggie, and Beth spent the several weeks keeping a close eye on Daryl. They told the others that the man had needed to have his appendix removed, that it had left Daryl bedridden for at least a few weeks. Luckily, Rick never suspected what had actually taken place. All this time, Rick had been under the impression that Daryl was no longer able to carry a child. Hell, Daryl think it was possible at this point either, but fuck, he’d been so wrong. 

Thank God for Hershel though. Hershel had kept his vow, he didn’t tell a soul, all the way up to the old man’s death. He died with his lips sealed, and took Daryl’s secret to his grave.

Daryl couldn’t have thanked the man enough. Ever.

Many months had passed from that point, from not only Hershel’s loss, but Lori’s weeks before. Rick had been torn apart by her death, She’d not only been bitten, but she’d been torn apart. Rick tried to save her, tried to cut his way through the group of walkers to his screaming wife. But it wasn’t enough. She was gone before he got to her. Daryl wanted to comfort the man, but truth be told, Daryl was still sore about the man choosing his wife over Daryl. A small, vindictive part of him was almost happy to see Rick in so much pain. He wasn’t happy with himself about feeling that way, but couldn’t seem to help it. In the end, Daryl wanted comfort just as much as Rick had. But the pain seemed to fade away with time on both ends, and the situation for not just them, but the entire group had improved. 

They finally had a new home.

They had Alexandria.

At long last, things seemed to be looking up. 

Well, for a while, anyway.

They’d been there for about week, until it happened, a distraught and emotionally disturbed Father Gabriel had made the heinous mistake of not securing the gate. One thing led to another, and soon a trail of shambling and groaning walkers had made their way into the walls of Alexandria.

“Daryl!”

The bowman’s ears rung and his eyes widened as a shot fired almost dangerously close to his ear. He could hear the bullet and the wind next to his head as the round cleared the side of his head, landing in the eye-socket of the walker behind him. Rick’s voice faded suddenly and the world felt like it was coming to a stop when Daryl saw the walker behind Rick, the dull teeth exposed for a moment before they came down into the flesh of Rick’s forearm, tearing deep into the skin and pulling up, snapping tendons and veins like it was tearing through a turkey leg.

Daryl’s arms came up three seconds too late, his finger pulled the trigger two seconds too late, and the bolt landed in the walker’s skull just one second too late.

The younger Dixon brother found himself screaming along with Rick as he ran toward him, “Fuck, Rick!!” The walker crumpled to the ground, Rick following after, going to his knees, staring at Daryl in absolute horror.

“Daryl, do it!” Rick screamed in urgency, “You’ve got to do it, shoot me!” 

“No fucking way,” Daryl shook his head, practically shoving one of the Alexandrians to the ground as he yanked the hatchet out of his hand, “Glenn, grab his arm!”

The Asian stared at Daryl in horrified shock, taking Rick’s bitten arm, holding it, and bracing himself. Maggie and Beth cried out in unison as Daryl swung the hatchet up, and Rick screamed. It took 4 good swings until the bone snapped and Rick’s hand separated from his arm. Glenn went pure white and passed out less than thirty seconds later. Then it was all a rush of gathering up Rick and Glenn, and getting them somewhere safe. Thankfully, the rest of the Alexandrians were able to get of the walkers. No one decided that they missed or felt pity for Father Gabriel despite the fact that he had succumb to the walkers as well.

Over the next few hours, Daryl proved to be quite the attentive nurse. They had a doctor living in the walls of Alexandria who had cauterized Rick’s arms, patched it up, and wrapped it. The man made no promises that Rick hadn’t already lost too much blood. Said there was a chance he wouldn’t make it through the night. He had Daryl to watch him though. Daryl stayed alert and attentive the entire first night, sitting behind Rick. They’d managed to take Rick back to the house that him, and Carl had been graciously given to live in. 

Daryl only left his side to use the bathroom, and even then, he’d left the door open, staring at Rick and hardly even blinking. 

“Fuck, man…You scared the shit out of me,” Daryl was at the edge of his seat, next to Rick’s bed, watching the man’s unconscious face. All he could do was wait. Daryl gripped Rick’s hand, staring at the stump that was resting on the other side of Rick’s body, “The fuck you thinkin’?” He cursed, knowing that Rick wasn’t going to respond, Hell, he couldn’t even hear him right now, “It ain’t my fault you weren’t paying attention to yourself,” Already, Daryl blamed himself. Rick saved him, kept that walker from taking a bite out of him, only to end up with one less hand. Shit. The guilt welling up inside of him was all the way at the back of his throat, swelling into the corners of his eyes. 

Hours passed as Daryl sat there, squeezing Rick’s unresponsive hand, remembering how comforting it had once been to feel Rick’s fingers in his hair. Fuck. This wasn’t fair. He stuck around this long to keep an eye on Rick, to make sure Rick didn’t do something stupid and drastic after Lori was killed. But in the end, Daryl wasn’t enough to keep Rick out of trouble.

“Nnngh…Dar…Daryl?”

Daryl’s head shot up, his eyes snapping open. He didn’t even realize that his head had dropped forward, eyes half open as sleep began to nip at the back of his mind.

“Rick! Christ, took you long enough to wake up,” Daryl sighed in relief, “If you’da checked out on me, I would have kicked your ass,”

Rick squinted, “What are you talking about…?” Rick half chuckled, looking down at what was left of his arm, “Dammit…It really wasn’t some messed up dream,”

Daryl swallowed, “Patched you up the best they could, how’s it feeling?”

“Sore,” Rick turned his head to eye Daryl, “But better then you’d think,” He swallowed dryly, “Daryl, thanks, you didn’t have to do that,” he referred to the act that had inevitably saved his life.

Daryl shook his head, “Couldn’t let you turn, you know that,” Daryl insisted, “You would have left Carl behind, kid deserves to have his father,” Daryl tried to act like he wasn’t being greedy. That his main motivation wasn’t the fact that he couldn’t stand the thought of loosing Rick, even if Rick had broken it off so many months ago, Hell, it was more than a year ago at this point.

Rick squeezed Daryl’s hand, “You were brave, Daryl, the way you handled it, you didn’t even hesitate, any longer, I wouldn’t have made it,” Rick nodded his head, “I can’t thank you enough,” 

Daryl looked away, “Don’t act like you owe me anythin’” Daryl tried to dismiss it, “’Sides, I couldn’t let you turn…not without telling you somethin’” Daryl’s hand moved to the top hem of his pants. 

Rick’s eyes lifted, “Tell me what?”

“You ‘member when Hershel took out my appendix?”

Rick nodded, “Daryl…Wha…?”

Daryl stood, lifting the edge of his shirt up, showing off the thick scar below his lower belly,   
“It weren’t no appendix he took out, Rick…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, pretty grisly, I know, guys.   
> But I really felt like I needed to get this out, and I needed it to be ugly.  
> Time to mention that this entire story is fueled by one of my greatest personal fears.  
> I am horrified of the idea of becoming pregnant. Just the simple fact that I have the ability to physically carry a child scares the living hell out of me. I feel like it would negate all of the progress that I've made in my transition. That people would say that it would make me 'less of a man,' if I were to ever even become pregnant - even if I got an abortion, it wouldn't erase the fact that my body carried another living thing inside of me at one point in time. I really just wanted to get those feelings out. People tell me all the time, whether they know that I'm trans or not that, "Oh, you'll want a kid one day," "Your body will crave being pregnant," "It's natural for everyone to want a baby eventually, and you'll love feeling it growing inside of you," No, no no nononononono. It's never going to happen. There. That's all. I'm done freaking out now.   
> I know this was a tough chapter, but I hope that you guys liked it in your own weird ways! :D


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First and foremost, I am so sorry for disappearing everyone! I actually went to a local anime convention from the 16th to the 18th of this month, a few days before, I was frantically finishing cosplays, and then I was taking a few days to recover. But now that I’ve gotten an actual day off, It’s time to crank out a bit more fiction. Enjoy!

“Didn’t think I could still get knocked up after all the T…” 

Daryl’s voice echoed through Rick’s skull, he sounded like he was miles away, voice thinned by the sound of howling wind even though they were in the same room in a small and tidy community of Alexandria.

“You proved me wrong – You got some damned stubborn swimmers there,”

The entire time that Daryl spoke, Rick could only stare in shock and horror at the scar on the other’s lower abdomen. It was jagged, not quite a proper stitching job, though Hershel had obviously done his best. Fuck. Hershel knew and Rick didn’t. Who else knew? Hershel couldn’t have done that operation alone. Why in the fuck had Daryl not told him all that time ago?

There was an uncomfortable silence in the cavern of Rick’s bedroom, Rick’s mouth hanging open limply, his tongue felt dry and incapable of moving, and for a few long seconds, Rick didn’t know if he’d be able to will himself to move again, at least…until.

“Fuck, Daryl,” Rick reflexively shoved Daryl in the chest with his good arm, to which Daryl had instinctively lifted a fist as to clock Rick right in the jaw – luckily, he was able to force himself to not land it and instead dropped it futilely back to his side. Rick grimaced, struggling to move into a sitting position, still weak from bloodloss, his movements clumsily and choppy, “Why in the Hell didn’t you tell me about this?! Who gave you the right to just kill our child like that without even saying a thing to me about it?!”

Daryl ground his teeth down, “The right?” His teeth squeaked with the force, “The fuck, Rick?” Daryl turned away momentarily, pushing a hand through his hair in frustration, tugging the strands as if to contain himself, “You woulda made me keep it, is that it?” He snapped his attention back to Rick, “Yeah, it woulda been so easy for you, huh? Make Daryl carry the fucking baby for nine months, doesn’t do a goddamned thing to Rick, you’d be just fine during the whole thing, and when it comes out, you’re the dad of the goddamn year, ain’t you?” Daryl hissed. 

Then again, he really wasn’t all that surprised, this was why Daryl didn’t tell Rick about it in the first place. Rick wasn’t the type to believe in abortions. They never talked about it directly, but Rick was far too righteous for that. Rick never would have supported Daryl’s decision. Daryl couldn’t have told him, they might have split by the time that Daryl found out, but if Daryl told him, he was sure that Rick would have had a fit, and together or not – Rick had still technically been the father. Even so, Daryl still felt entitled to make that decision on his own, despite Rick’s feelings.

Rick’s lips parted as if to shoot something back, his features sharp, his tone bitter, but his entire disposition began to change as Daryl cut him off.

“I ain’t no fucking woman, Rick! You knew that before anyone else in the group did, and I trusted you to respect that,” Daryl reeled his voice back, trying not to shout, not wanting to draw any unnecessary attention, “You have any fucking idea what just finding out about it did to me?” Of course, Rick didn’t, because Daryl hadn’t told him, “Fuck, Rick…You know what everyone else woulda done to me after finding out?” He turned his head away with a sharp snort, “I woulda been a fuckin’ joke, Rick? Some kind of circus freak. People would have started asking my ‘real,’ name, what kinda junk I had done there, started calling me a woman….” Daryl’s voice slowly became softer and softer as he imagined how his life would have changed if he’d kept the child, “All those years I spent trying to get away from the way I was born, they woulda meant nothing after that; the surgeries, the shots, all that fuckin’ money…” 

Rick’s chest ached, his lungs felt tight, and he was torn between being furious, and suddenly feeling sympathetic to his former lover. Daryl was right, but, “We could have left the group, Daryl, no one else needed to know,” Rick slowly sat up, facing he other through the darkness. Rick didn’t seem to understand the severity of his words, or how easy it would have been for him to leave Lori and everyone else behind if he knew what Daryl had been going through. It would have been disgustingly easy for him, and he should have been ashamed.

“It ain’t just about the others, you woulda thought about me differently,” Daryl pointed out, “How could you see me as a man after that?” He finished the thought with a deep swallow, “Didn’t matter that you broke it off by the time I found out…I wanted things to go back to normal, as much as they could,”

“Jesus, Daryl,” Rick sighed, lifting his remaining hand up and gesturing Daryl to take it, to which Daryl resisted for a moment, before stepping closer and laying his hand in Rick’s palm, “You’re wrong,” Daryl’s brows lifted, “You’ve never been any less of a man in my eyes; not when I found out, not when we made love, and even that never would have changed how I see you,” Rick’s words were soft, careful, reassuring, and made Daryl’s chest feel tight and strangely uneasy, as if he wasn’t sure if he believed the former Sheriff or not. Sure, there was nothing but honesty in Rick’s eyes, but things could have changed between them, even if Rick didn’t intend for them to.

Daryl squeezed Rick’s hand as if silently saying that he understood. Only at this closer distance, was Rick able to see the moisture in Daryl’s eyes, and it was obvious why Daryl wasn’t giving him a verbal answer – If Daryl had even tried, his voice would have cracked, and Daryl didn’t want Rick to know that he was holding back tears. Despite his hardened exteriors, Daryl was a vulnerable man, sensitive to things that he’d never admit out loud. So instead of demanding an answer, Rick used his remaining hand to tug Daryl downward, catching the man against his chest. Instinct told Rick to embrace Daryl with both arms, but the throbbing pain in what was left of his arm instantly made him lower it back to his side. 

Daryl’s hands wound themselves tightly into Rick’s shirt, “You’re gonna hurt yourself,” And there it was, the slight crack in Daryl’s voice, just like Rick anticipated, “Lay down,” Daryl demanded, pulling himself away and aiding Rick in getting back into the bed.

“I never stopped wanting you, Daryl,” Rick broke the silence as he was settled back against the bed, but Daryl scowled.

“You did what you had to,” Daryl snapped, wiping the back of one hand over his eye, “You had Lori, and Carl, they had you before I did…had no right to think I deserved you more than them,”

“Daryl…” Rick frowned, urging Daryl to lay down or at least sit next to him with his hand, “I’ve made mistakes, I’m not denying that…If I could have done that all over, I should have been honest with Lori. I thought that things could go back to normal…if I pushed you away…but I was wrong, it didn’t change my feelings for you, ending things between us couldn’t make me stop loving you…”

Daryl’s throat felt tight, and for a brief moment, he wanted to flee from the room, get the Hell out of there and take those words in, understand them before he acted rashly, but instead, he moved himself to Rick’s side and wrapped an arm behind the man’s shoulders, leaning into his body, “You need to rest, Rick,” Daryl tipped his head to the side, his lips against Rick’s hair, and Rick couldn’t tell if the man had pressed a quick kiss into the dark locks, “You need anything, you wake me up,” 

Rick smiled faintly. In his own way, Daryl was forgiving him, and Rick knew it, but he also knew that Daryl was a stubborn man who didn’t often like revealing his feelings –after all this time, he still seemed to think that showing his emotions, that letting them out made him weak. Daryl was wrong, so wrong. Daryl was stronger than he’d ever know.

Not long after Rick allowed his eyes to fall shut, he faintly heard a grumble from the man next to him, “Love you too,” Rick’s heart fluttered, and he was soon asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for this being short guys, I just really wanted to get something up since it's been such a long time.   
> Also, smut will be coming shortly. If not in the next chapter, then the one after :D


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut!! It's finally here!!  
> And of course...it's my longest chapter...  
> Coincidence? I think not?  
> Unrealistic sex coming up ahead!  
> You are warned!

As expected, it was difficult for Rick to adjust to losing one of his arms, and despite what he believed for a long time, the experience made him respect Hershel even more. The man had it more difficult, he imagined. Losing a leg seemed much more severe than losing an arm. Rick at least could walk without any assistance. Then again, Hershel could have used a shotgun – Something that Rick could no longer do, now it was all handguns and pistols for him here on out, and time to forget about ever learning to shoot a crossbow like Daryl had offered in the past.

Speaking of Daryl. 

Daryl had been a gem from the time that Rick had lost his arm, helping Rick along, but refusing to treat him like a baby. Rick had too much pride to be treated like a child and Daryl knew it. But of course, certain things would take a greater learning curve. Rick had to be thankful that it was his left arm and not his right. At least he didn’t have to relearn things like eating and writing with his left hand. 

It was difficult for Daryl in it’s own right though. Though he was relieved that Rick had made it through, he felt somewhat guilty for being the one to cut Rick’s arm free – this must have been how Rick felt when he severed Hershel’s leg, and yet, he didn’t regret it. It had been an impulse, and he knew, that if he hadn’t have done it, Rick would have a bullet in his brain by now. He’d rather have a living Rick with one less arm, than Rick with all of his limbs and a taste for human flesh. 

Well, there were some cases where tasting flesh was all fine and dandy.

Like in the early morning, sunlight just barely peeking through the windows while Daryl cupped both sides of Rick’s face, gently molding their lips together. Rick was still asleep, but that didn’t seem to stop Daryl from slinging one leg over Rick’s waist, hoisting himself over the man, and leaning down to drape his body over the man’s chest.

“Nnngh…Daryl…” Came Rick’s sleep ridden reply, his voice muffled by the way that Daryl insistently nipped at Rick’s lower lip, a chuckle fluttering from his mouth as he pulled back to stare at Rick’s closed eyes. 

“Come on…best way to start the day, Rick,” Daryl planted both of his hands on either side of Rick’s head, slowly circling his hips which managed to draw a soft groan from Rick’s lips, his eyes finally fluttering open to catch sight of the handsome archer dangling above him, dark hair covering Daryl’s eyes.

Rick couldn’t help but chuckle, “You’re worse than a preteen, you know that,” Of course, he was right though, and the look on Daryl’s face proved that Daryl knew it too. It wasn’t something that he showcased by any means, but Daryl did have a fierce sexuality, one that didn’t really show itself until Rick came into his life – Rick was more than happy to keep him satisfied though.

“You love it though,” Daryl husked gently, leaning himself back down to eagerly take control of Rick’s lips once again. Rick only complied, shifting himself with his shoulders and raising his arm to thread his fingers through Daryl’s hair. Teeth clashed, and breath mingled together as each man teasingly fought for dominance of the kiss. But of course, all it took was a roll of Daryl’s hips, and Rick became putty in his hands, gasping into the kiss and tugging at Daryl’s hair. 

From the time that Rick lost his arm, they had been extremely careful in between the bed sheets. It had taken them a few times to figure out what worked, and what didn’t. More often than not, they found themselves with Rick laying face up on the covers with Daryl over his waist, riding him, driving himself along Rick’s length. It worked for the two of them, and neither of them minded, despite the fact that this was a position that wasn’t favorite of theirs in the past. They leaned that it had it’s advantages. Rick liked being able to see Daryl, watch his every move from a comfortable position, liked the way that he could easily see where the two of them were connected, and the best part was being able to so easily tease Daryl with his remaining hand. He would often stroke Daryl’s thigh, grip his waist, and probably the favorite for both of them was that Rick was able to easily slide his hand between Daryl’s thighs, gently slipping his fingers between the fold’s of Daryl’s sex to tease the small but engorged clit there until Daryl went limp in his hands after a breathtaking orgasm.

However, it was time for a change, “Mmmph, Daryl…I want…like before,” Rick couldn’t even seem to finish his thought, his brain already struggling to process words. 

Daryl parted their lips gently, breathing heavily against Rick’s mouth, “You’re gonna have to be a little more specific,” Daryl pointed out, clothes feeling way too restrictive by this point. 

Rick allowed his hand to free itself from Daryl’s hair, sliding down the man’s back, over the slope of his hip, and down the curve of his ass, “Let me take you from behind, like I used to?”

Daryl’s stomach flipped at just the idea of it. Fuck. Letting Rick take him while he was on his hands and knees. Good god. That had been Daryl’s favorite position, and he was pretty sure it was Rick’s too. Oddly enough, it made Daryl feel more like a man, even if he was forced onto his hands and knees like some kind of pet. He liked the animalistic feeling, the primal sensations of it all. Clearly, from the way that his breath hitched, and his sex pulsed in excitement was a sign that he was definitely more than game, and yet, “You sure, you’re ready for that, with your arm?” He didn’t want Rick to end up losing his balance and hurting himself, the last thing that either of them needed was to hurt one another, especially during this delicate moment.

“Won’t know until we try, right?” 

Came Rick’s reply, as Daryl practically dove from the man’s lap.

“Anything hurts, you better stop and tell me, got it?” Daryl sat himself up, helping Rick resituate himself and aiding him in losing his shirt. After all this time, and a half naked Rick still wound Daryl up tighter than a corkscrew. Daryl swallowed at the sight, not even phased in the slightest by Rick’s missing arm. Hell, even Rick had been disgusted by it at first, but Daryl didn’t seem to care one bit. Then again, it was the same case during the first few times that Rick had seen Daryl stripped down. Daryl had been nervous, anxious, worried that when Rick saw everything without any kind of barrier that he wouldn’t be interested anymore. Luckily, Daryl had been wrong, and as Daryl shed his clothing slowly, half teasing Rick, it was clear that by the look in Rick’s eyes, nothing had changed about the way that he felt about Daryl’s body. 

Rick shifted, guiding Daryl to lay against the bed, skin practically glowing in the soft morning sunlight, “What you starin’ at?” Daryl protested, looking like he didn’t understand why he wasn’t face down in the covers yet. Rick only smiled softly from his position between Daryl’s legs as he smoothed his palm over Daryl’s chest.

“It’s been a while, just let me, alright?” Rick’s eyes cast themselves over Daryl’s body, soft scars ticked into his flesh from running through the forest as a kid, scraps on his knees, burn marks on his fingertips from when he learned how to light a fire with no matches. But certain scars were a little more…unusual. But they made Daryl who he was, so they were precious to Rick. Rick’s fingers moved over Daryl’s chest, gliding over the scars from the man’s double mastectomy. Two thick jagged lines just under where his bust line once was. Daryl had told Rick that before the surgery, he was surprisingly developed there, which was why the scars left there were still not healed well. They’d had more tissue to remove. At first, Rick was often curious about how Daryl looked before the surgery, and found that trying to imagine Daryl as he was now with breasts seemed…not very accurate. In the end though, it didn’t matter what Daryl looked like before the surgery, because Daryl was happier this way. Daryl was obviously content with how he looked for the most part, and that was what Rick cared about most. Rick smiled softly, “You are one of the most gorgeous things I’ve ever seen in my life,”

Daryl snorted, rolling his eyes, “You have to put it that way?” Daryl never would have considered himself ‘gorgeous,’ or even as much of a looker. He’d been told for years after he began transitioning that he’d been such a pretty girl, and that he was ruining himself. Little did he realize that he had a rugged charm that had a history of practically melting the panties off many a young lady. They didn’t matter to Daryl though, no, the only one he wanted, he had right here. He had Rick, that was all he would ever need.

Rick chuckled softly, letting his hand slip further down Daryl’s body, stopping briefly at his hip, “Most handsome then,” he corrected himself, letting his fingers then trace the line of scar tissue just under Daryl’s navel. Daryl’s breath hitched.

“Ngh, Rick, wait,” Daryl protested, shifting himself onto his elbows.

Rick only leaned down, smoothed his palm over the scar and kissed it lightly. Daryl’s brows lightly, at first in confusion, “I never could have asked you to keep it,” he whispered against the risen and scarred flesh, “You did the right thing,”

Daryl stiffened, hands clenching the sheets, “You gotta bring this up now?” He turned his head away briefly, not wanting to look Rick in the face at that moment, unsure if he could hold it together.

“Just thought you should know,” Rick replied softly, “Spread your legs a little,” Rick urged.

“I thought you were gonna…” Daryl did as he was asked, but looked confused.

“And I will, but there’s something I wanted to do before…thought I’d treat you first,” Rick kissed a line across to Daryl’s hip bone, flicking his eyes downward. If there was one thing that Daryl had been incredibly insecure of when they first got together, it was that…the soft feminine mound resting between his legs. At first, there were doubts that Rick thought of him as a man, that Rick might only want him because sleeping with Daryl was like sleeping with a woman. However, if Daryl had ever directly voiced these worries, Rick would have said that intimacy with Daryl was nothing like it had ever been with a woman, or with Lori.

Daryl’s compliance was rewarded as Rick’s face slipped between his thighs, Rick using two fingers to gently slide between the folds of the man’s sex, parting the puffy lips there. Daryl’s eyes rolled backward and he moaned lowly as Rick’s tongue gently slid up against one outer lip, upwards, barely flicking his clit and journeying down the lip on the other side. “Fu…Fuck…Rick…” Daryl stammered softly, torn between liking the teasing and wanting Rick to just get to it already. Rick smirked softly and then allowed his tongue to slip between the two soft lips, swiping upwards and forcing a gasp out of Daryl’s throat. Rick enjoyed teasing the man this way, getting to taste him and explore his most vulnerable area. Surely, Daryl had been a little apprehensive at first, and even a little pissed at Rick at just the idea of the man going down on him, but when Rick asked if it would be okay, and asked what Daryl wanted him to call that part of him, that’s when Daryl figured that it wouldn’t hurt to give it a try. 

They settled first on what Rick couldn’t call it. Daryl hated the idea of calling it a pussy, that was just…no, because he wasn’t a woman, he couldn’t stand the idea of calling it something so girly sounding. And as for his clit, well, it wasn’t a clit. If Rick was going to call it anything, Daryl wanted him to call it a cock. It didn’t matter if it was small, and if it couldn’t cum like Rick’s could. Rick was kind enough to do as Daryl asked. And fuck, if hearing Rick ask to suck his cock wasn’t the sexiest thing he’d ever heard in his life, he didn’t know what was. 

Rick gently curled his tongue around the engorged nub that had slowly started to come out of it’s hood. After all the years on hormones, it had grown larger, but it was still only a few centimeters long. But regardless of it’s size, Rick found that it was just arousing, if not more than being with a man with more…typical anatomy. Rick parted his lips, slipping himself closer as he tightened them back around the small appendage between his lips, sucking gently and cradling his tongue against the small member as he did so, his eyes lifting to catch the expression on Daryl’s face. It was beautiful, absolutely beautiful, and Daryl could say nothing to change his mind on his choice of words, “Ri-Rick…more…”

Rick certainly couldn’t deny Daryl his breathy plea, not with the way that Daryl’s legs had wound behind his shoulders, a hand suddenly plunging into his hair, or the sweet but heavy taste on Rick’s tongue. So Rick obliged by pulling away, only momentarily before he resituated his fingers, forcing Daryl’s lips to spread more before allowing his tongue to slide over that hidden hole, a sweet wetness spreading over his tongue as he plunged it inside to explore Daryl’s sopping wet cavern, “Ah, Fuck!!” Daryl cried out above him, jackknifing against the bed, causing Rick to nearly chuckle as he slowly worked his tongue against Daryl’s inner muscles.

The first few times after Daryl had agreed to letting Rick go down on him, Daryl had insisted that Rick keep it just to sucking his cock, that he wouldn’t let Rick go sticking his tongue anywhere else down there. But after a few times, during the middle of it, he eventually wanted to try something a little different, which very ineloquently came out of Daryl’s mouth in an ungraceful cry of, _“Tongue fuck me already,”_ while Rick had been busy sucking Daryl’s member dry. Of course, Rick had been a bit baffled at first, but gave Daryl what he wanted, and fuck, they’d both loved it from that point.

They’d only been lovers for a few weeks before Rick had broken it off, but in those few precious weeks, they’d explored each other over and over. Eagerly memorizing the landscape of one another’s body, taking in each little weak spot, each pressure point, and those spots that would send each other right over the edge. Rick had become very acquainted with the view from between Daryl’s legs, finding fairly quickly that this was something that Daryl was comfortable…vaginal sex however had been a little different. It was the only thing that Rick had ever known, he’d been reluctant to engage in anal with Daryl, so the first few times, Daryl agreed that they could handle this the way that Rick knew how. Rick thought it might ease Daryl, loosen him up if he worked him with his mouth first, and then his fingers.

Even now as Rick brought Daryl dangerously close to the edge, only to back off just enough to keep Daryl from tumbling over, he gently slipped the tip of one finger in alongside his tongue, teasingly circling it beneath his tongue to keep Daryl teetering right at the edge. Daryl cursed under his breath, lifting one hand to his mouth and biting down at the juncture between his thumb and index finger to stifle himself. Of course, Rick would have preferred to hear him, but with the close quarters between houses, he knew it wasn’t the smartest thing. No one in the group knew about them, they didn’t think it was best to tell – however, they wouldn’t be surprised if someone eventually figured it out, what with Daryl sneaking over to Rick’s in the middle of the night so often.

“Ri-Rick, Fu-fucking stop teasing…!” Daryl husked out, chest heaving and muscles tight with want. Rick moaned softly, slowly turning his eyes back up to Daryl as he slowly slipped another finger inside of him, pulling his mouth away with a wet pop before sucking Daryl’s trembling member back into his mouth. Those two fingers plunged easily into the man, quirking inside of Daryl and twisting until they scraped against something almost painfully sensitive. Daryl bit into his hand harder, tossing his head back as every fiber inside of him curled tight, heat coursing through him as he finally tumbled over that razor thin edge. Rick groaned at the sights and sounds of Daryl’s orgasm, able to feel Daryl’s channel clenching hard on his fingers, growing even more slick with fluid, beginning to pulse rhythmically as the entirety of the climax washed over Daryl. As he came down, Daryl went limp against the covers, breathing heavily, arms falling lmp as his chest heaved deeply, “Shit…that was…” Daryl couldn’t even finish his thought, and Rick only glanced up at him, smirking that he’d pulled his lips away from Daryl’s own netherlips, only to gently give his fingers a wiggle which left Daryl gasping and rolling his eyes back, “Dammit, Rick…I want you…” 

Rick swallowed heavily, only now paying any mind to the erection painfully throbbing between his own legs. Slowly, he slipped his fingers out of Daryl, bringing them to his lips and licking them clean without a second thought. He could heard Daryl snort and mutter out, “Pervert,” Before Daryl rolled himself onto his stomach and lifted his hips. Daryl was a generous lover, and it turned out that Rick was as well, neither of them had any issue in pleasing the other and not getting release themselves – however, their constant need to please one another typically ended up in love making taking hours, almost as though they were trying to one up the other, until they were both completely exhausted.

As Rick peeled his pants away, leaving himself bare, he cast his eyes over Daryl’s form, patiently waiting for him in position. His hips were up, legs spread and propped on his knees, just enough to let Rick see both of the entrances that Daryl’s body offered. It was difficult for Rick not to appreciate the sight of Daryl’s more feminine channel that he’d just gotten a taste of, slick and dripped, moisture trailing down his inner thighs, the lips still puffy and swollen with arousal, still twitching from release. Rick moaned, sliding himself to Daryl’s body, instantly grinding his hips against Daryl’s backside as he draped his upper body over Daryl’s back, like a blanket of flesh. It was a little trickier for Rick to find his balance, used to having another hand to hold himself up while he aligned himself with Daryl’s body. But this time, Daryl moved a hand to Rick’s shoulder, as awkward as it was, trying to help Rick balance while Rick took his hand down between them, gently taking a hold of himself and lining his already throbbing member with Daryl’s sopping wet entrance, moaning at the way that his head slipped between Daryl’s quivering lips.

“Ngh…Rick…Don’t…Not there,” Daryl groaned underneath him, protesting softly, “I want you in…” Daryl swallowed, “The other one,” 

Rick nodded against Daryl’s shoulder, turning his head to kiss the man’s neck, “Anything you want, Daryl,” he whispered softly, tilting his hips softly, “I won’t go in…not there, I promise, but just…I thought this might make it easier, we’re almost out of lotion,” It was damned hard to find lube nowadays, so lotion was a quick fix, though not ideal, “I won’t take you where you don’t want it though,” Rick shifted his hand, guiding his member to slowly slide between Daryl’s lips, but not daring to dip inside of him, just sliding his length between them. Daryl began to tremble at the stimulation, but as he tipped his head and glanced down, he understood what Rick was doing.

And it was the hottest fucking thing that had ever crossed his mind.

Rick was sliding his member between Daryl’s lips to use Daryl’s fluids like lube. 

“Ngh, Fuck…Rick…You keep that up much longer…” Daryl warned lightly as his legs spread themselves further, without even noticing. 

Rick moaned softly, “I just don’t want to hurt you, You know that,” 

Only when Rick felt as though his length was slick enough with Daryl’s fluids, did Rick pull away and readjust his hips. He prodded the tip of his member just against the tight pucker of Daryl’s ass. Rick knew from the beginning that this was what Daryl preferred, said it made him feel more like a man if he was taking it up the rear – since Daryl was always so eloquent and gentle with his speech habits. Slowly, Rick pushed his hips forward, moaning as Daryl opened up for him, the slick from Daryl’s other entrance making the slow journey forward smooth and easy. Underneath him, Daryl groaned lowly, tipping his hips, and guiding Rick inside as he fisted the bedsheets. Rick kept his pace slow and steady, not stopping or stuttering until he was fully sheathed inside of Daryl, completely connected once again. Rick sighed against Daryl’s neck, “You doing alright?” Rick steadied his hand on Daryl’s side. 

Daryl turned his eyes towards Rick, and grinned like a cat, “I’d be doing better if you started movin,’” 

Rick chuckled softly, slowly pushing himself up and going onto his knees, steadying himself by gripping Daryl’s hip, “Never been the patient type,” He pulled his hips back slowly, idly glancing downward and moaning at the way that Daryl’s hole squeezed tightly around him, as if it didn’t want to let him go. Once just the tip was resting inside of his lover, Rick firmly rolled his hips forward, sinking deep into Daryl. In response, Daryl moaned, rolling his hips back and following Rick’s lead. It was funny how t had been so long since they’d indulged in one another’s bodies, and yet, it was like their bodies never forgot each other. They moved together easily, hips pushing toward each other, the sounds of flesh colliding echoing through the room, accented by Daryl’s muffled gasps and moans, and peppered by the soft grunting coming from the back of Rick’s throat. 

Every so often, broken words would tumble from Daryl’s mouth, “Ha-Harder…Ngh, don’t stop,” Daryl’s features were twisted in pleasure, his head tipped to the side just enough so that Rick could see the desire washing over his face each time Rick plunged inside of him, filling him to the brim, and stealing his breath away. It had never been like this with Lori; this passionate, this needy, this desperate. Rick tried not to pick it apart, all he knew was that he just needed the way that Daryl made him feel, and he could only hope that Daryl felt the same. It hadn’t taken long for Rick to bring Daryl right back to orgasm, caressing Daryl’s insides with his member, and whispering sweet nothings down to him as Rick watched each of Daryl’s reactions, the way he trembled and squirmed, “Fu-Fuck….Ri-Rick…!” Daryl bit hard onto the sheets, almost sobbing as another climax ripped through him, his body quivering and winding tight. 

But Rick didn’t stop, instead, he laid himself back over Daryl, settling himself deep inside of the other, his thrusts became short and erratic, eagerly forcing Daryl through his second release of the night, and heading for a third. It was almost too much for Daryl, he trembled, squeezing the sheet under him until his knuckles turned white. He groaned, vision going dark as his second release quickly turned into a third, and by the time it settled through him, he went limp like a boneless fish. Rick moaned heavily against Daryl’s neck, enjoying the way that Daryl’s body convulsed around him as though it were trying to suck him dry, and as that third orgasm tumbled through Daryl’s body, Rick finally found his own, slamming his hips into Daryl’s as he came deep inside of the other, loving the way that it felt to know that he was leaving something of himself inside of his lover, where no one else was allowed to tread.

Daryl was heaving loudly, half chuckling, “Jesus, Rick…” He turned his head, giving an exhausted smile, and it was so goddamned beautiful, “You’re gonna kill me at this rate,” He sighed heavily, still gulping in air. 

Rick shifted himself, leaning forward to kiss Daryl’s forehead, “Don’t forget, this was your idea of a morning workout,”

“Mmmm, One hell of a workout,” Daryl chuckled, only to gasp when Rick slowly slid out of him and gave him a playful and well-meaning slap to the arse. 

Rick all but collapsed beside Daryl, thoroughly worn out, Daryl on the other hand, was wound up, and could only lay beside Rick, watching his sleeping face as he waited for Rick to get up again so they could try to start the day again. 

At this rate, they could very well be in bed all day.

Daryl wouldn’t mind one bit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please understand that this is not actually how anal sex works.  
> You should always use a proper lube, and lots of preparation beforehand to ensure an enjoyable experience for both parties.  
> However, please also understand that fanfiction can be written however it is the author chooses,   
> Which means that it is not always going to be realistic and accurate :D  
> It's fiction, it's smuts, it's meant to be hot, not medically accurate.
> 
> Thank you :D


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